tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8031136930490578569.post6323431853916750921..comments2023-10-24T07:19:08.063-07:00Comments on Savory & Sick: English BreakfastSavory Sweethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01854692427283938498noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8031136930490578569.post-42455457718069327142010-03-25T15:53:58.091-07:002010-03-25T15:53:58.091-07:00Wow, I completely get this.Wow, I completely get this.svartsjarmhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08744052709164993344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8031136930490578569.post-55278130528016213492009-12-15T18:10:53.147-08:002009-12-15T18:10:53.147-08:00Thankyou for the lovely things you said about my b...Thankyou for the lovely things you said about my blog :)Lillie Forgivenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04059161208601783016noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8031136930490578569.post-81206550711447394642009-12-15T17:03:06.493-08:002009-12-15T17:03:06.493-08:00I've been eating and behaving like a monstrous...I've been eating and behaving like a monstrous cow for months now, and while I'm incredibly frustrated by it and angry at myself and terrified of gaining yet more weight, my mood is the best it has been in years. I know starvation makes you depressed, but still amazed at the tangible magnitude of the effect. As I lose control of my eating I find my body swelling and my thighs dimpling and my chins multiplying... I feel completely revolting and yet... better.<br /><br />I still want to starve myself back down though. Pretty weird.Pascohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07378294844687030241noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8031136930490578569.post-71685234469884350702009-12-15T16:51:34.010-08:002009-12-15T16:51:34.010-08:00ahhh mon amie, that is EXACTLY where i am...stuck ...ahhh mon amie, that is EXACTLY where i am...stuck between two worlds, not able to not care about food and weight, but knowing that health is better, is smarter. suck suck suck. not skinny enough / too skinny? i feel like i'm living in that shimmery world of a heat haze rising off the desert or a car or whatever, you know? skewed and strange. my life is full of burritos and panic about burritos. i am also at the point where i'm aware i shouldn't lose any weight until after the holidays or my parents are going to be very concerned. yuck. i can't wait that long. <br /><br />xx xmaishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04333342795855939406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8031136930490578569.post-53348823102035529262009-12-15T09:38:20.964-08:002009-12-15T09:38:20.964-08:00I hated refeeding. I cried a lot...a lot. We went ...I hated refeeding. I cried a lot...a lot. We went on a family trip to Europe and I cried all the time...every skinny girl made me cry.<br />I was a lean, mean crying machine and my body felt terrible and bloated. And then I lost weight because my metabolism sped up. So I don't even know what my body needs anymore.<br />Now anytime I have an ailment, my anorexia is blamed. Even though my BMI is 19, they still blame the anorexia. And now that I'm back on the road to hell, I dread those days. <br />Darling, I'm sorry, those were dark times in my life, refeeding. I agree with you on acting normal around your family. I really should not lose too much more before I go to my boyfriend's family and my own. But when I go abroad....it will be my own life to live. <br />xoxo<br />LizLiz Anatasiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17370703327313888167noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8031136930490578569.post-83224755786425018052009-12-15T07:43:11.465-08:002009-12-15T07:43:11.465-08:00Maybe your body just doesn't know how to handl...Maybe your body just doesn't know how to handle the "healthiness" since it's been "sick" for so long? Just a thought.<br />I know the feeling of limbo, and it sucks. i always do just what marya says and get sick again because it's what i know.<br />Feel better, sweetie.Ana's Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10588270419894145137noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8031136930490578569.post-62507286456188038512009-12-15T04:03:05.009-08:002009-12-15T04:03:05.009-08:00It's hard but I think you're absolutely ri...It's hard but I think you're absolutely right about trying to keep your body at the current weight so that people don't start stressing about it.<br />I think you should just enjoying seeing your friends and your mum and her cooking. You need a break, you certainly deserve it! Just keep grounded and don't go extreme. Deal with it again when you're back in January.<br /><br />Going back a bit (because I know I have been awol for a few weeks) shopping is a MASSIVE problem for me. At uni I used to buy dresses for over £100 and never wear them - or wear them only once. I couldn't control my spending, always had to get new dresses, new shoes, new everything... money was no object... <br />Actually the worst thing for me is cosmetics - I will spend any amount on face wash, makeup, hair products - anything to look beautiful and perfect - I guess thats the same with clothes as well - I'll spend any amount so that the outfit makes me look as amazing as possible. I never wore jeans or trousers anywhere.<br />When it comes to food shopping I used to always wander around the supermarket looking at the backs of the labels to count calories, taking things, putting them back, often spending stupid money on ridiculous products like gluten-free bread or pots of branded seeds, mushy fruit bars - whatever diet fad I had decided for myself. And then of course there were the binge shops... where I would spend £10 on icecream, bread, chocolate - stuff my face with it and then throw it up - what a loser I am.<br /><br />Going even further back to a post where you were talking about your flatmates. It reminded me so much of my flat last year. I hated it so much. They were always commenting that they never saw - I was never in the kitchen - the habitual communal centre - I only ate when the kitchen was empty, after everyone had gone to bed... I'd creep in...<br />But at least it was easy to keep myself away from food then... at home I'm just surrounded by it constantly.<br /><br />Anyway, I hope things are going well, sorry again for lack of commenting recently!<br />all my love xxxOpheliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06804728080052960584noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8031136930490578569.post-86709954823138140352009-12-15T01:41:33.952-08:002009-12-15T01:41:33.952-08:00I don't think your body is wigging out on you ...I don't think your body is wigging out on you because you're getting healthy. Healthy is not being bloated and breaking out, but your body going into shock because it's been neglected for so long certainly is.<br />Not that you didn't already know that.<br /><br />Oh, and speaking of cliche, I'm reciting a passage from Wasted for my Effective Speaking final. I did a dry run of it in front of the class last week and it was like I was the only person to ever mention anorexia to them in 5 years. I forget not everyone has been thrust into the middle of the Ana Blog underground like I have.<br /><br />I certainly thought of you when I read it.<br /><br />-Summerwhat if summer...https://www.blogger.com/profile/06745197837769715801noreply@blogger.com