Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Beauty is Pain

I have come to a conclusion.

If it doesn't feel like you are starving, like the weight is just melting off because it's just so uncomfortable... you probably aren't, not matter how few calories you are consuming.

In short: beauty is pain.


Yesterday I ate 300 cals. Today I weighed exactly the same. Uh, by the logic of the last few days, I should have been down at least .5lbs. I rationalized it was because I had gone to bed without any terrible hunger pains, or cravings, or irrational feelings about food.

I spread out my calories and ate things that would make me feel fuller (I apologize to those of you who don't like seeing lists of food, but I have to demonstrate my point):

1 vegetarian hot dog w/ mustard (110)
1 cucumber w/ garlic salt, pepper, & taco bell sauce (45)
Shirataki noodles w/ tomato sauce & steamed veggies (120)
Frozen grapes (25)

So overall I did amazing. If I was trying to maintain, this would be the perfect meal plan... I wasn't denying myself, the shirataki noodles, even though they had the consistency of biting into cooked mushrooms, were only 20 cals and when you love pasta, you can't beat that!

But I lost nothing, which means, that clearly I can't do this anymore. I mean, fuck, I ate 400+ calories of ice cream and a handful of cheese puffs the day before and lost almost a pound... but I was writhing in pain later that night because that's all I ate and I had a sugar crash.


Bottom line, if it's not hard, you aren't going to lose. Now excuse me while I treat myself to a sandwich (omg it's been forever since I've had bread!) and then allow myself NOTHING ELSE for at least 24 hours. The end.


nadja said...

i know what you mean, sweetie. lots of hugs!

Skinny Lady said...

All I'm going to say is...CUCUMBER WITH TACO BELL SAUCE? That's both genius and disgusting all at once.

Pasco said...

When we get too wrapped up in the numbers game we forget what it is that we are measuring when we get on the scales. Self worth? No. Success? No. Control? No. In fact it's a big skin sack full of flesh and guts and bones and blood and stuff. Oh, and fat!

So when the numbers don't drop exactly proportionally to our eating, we think "fuck, I am a worthless failure with no control". But if you actually think rationally there are an infinite number of physiological reasons for why we could still be losing fat but not changing weight.

But then, if we could think rationally then we wouldn't be in this mess at all, right?


Pasco said...

hahaha my security word was "waste"

Ana said...

Wow - I love this post. I've been letting myself get far too comfortable.

PrettyWreck said...

You know, it's true. I hate to say it but it's true.

I'm fucking with my calorie in take right now because it's all I have left to try and shake this stupid plateau. I love when the math doesn't work. Bodies do not adhere to logic, I tell you.

...I must try these noodles you speak of, now.

G. Samsa said...

I'm still convinced it's all about the numbers, at least over time. On a day-to-day basis, it's another story entirely. Salt intake in particular seems to mess with my weight, hence my recent ban on miso soup.

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